Sully

A spontaneous post, so please forgive me if it seems a little rushed.

Lately I’ve been feeling quite dead.

It’s been a long term at school. I like to pretend that the simple stress of work and teenage life that almost everyone has to go through hasn’t affected me a lot, but it has. I feel awful.

I feel drained. Like all the bubbly energetic life I had in September has been sucked out of me by a merciless Dementor.

As I said, a spontaneous post, so forgive my kind of crap simile.

But I’ve been feeling down in general too. And I’ve not been telling many people about it.

I’ve just kind of lost my mojo. Passion for life. My desire. My bedrock. My purpose.

What’s the point?

And that question gets asked a lot, by me, and by a lot of people, but I’ve kind of lost my point in life recently. Life has been dictated by tests and exams and marks and academic success and I’ve found it hard to see the bigger picture.

So what’s Sully got to do with anything?

Sully has helped me find my feet again.

Big picture

Lately, I’ve been getting a bit more overwhelmed than usual.

What I mean by this is that, in the midst of all the work and hassle and hustle and bustle of normal life, I’ve not had any time for me, to relax, to reflect, to reminisce, to contemplate life generally.

And having that time is important.

Rise

 

Internalise the darkness, see the cold dance through the air:
Let them soak the soul within you, turn emotion full to bare;
See the brute reality rising,
Its eyes shining,
Wide and clear.

Life whispers within you, for the battle is not done,
The troops have all deserted yet the leader still clings on;
Light still weakly fights,
For paradise,
For dreams to come.

In vain. For hope is gone, but a solider now in flight,
And joy, reason, emotion: all fall victim to the night.
The cold and dark descend,
No thing transcends,
No one thing might.

We bathe in seas of nothing, in black blankness do I swim;
The stars within me flicker, my heart weakens, dark and dim;
My life now slowly dying,
Embers flying,
Chokes within.

It seems a long lost mission: doomed to dust and death am I.
My existence but a drop of breath, a weak and feeble sigh; 
The speck of hope long gone,
Fate soldiers on,
My end is nigh.

But wait! Something inside me, something stirring in my core,
Like magic! Potions dining, feasting on death's knocking door,
They rise! Hope coalesces,
Black egresses,
Start the war!

Ascend! Rise up! Life reignites, the mystery fuel burns,
Electric hope takes charge, steers through dark waves which cry and churn,
The light begins emerging,
Victory verging,
Tables turn.

From where? From where did this light make its sudden claim to fame?
From love: its resolution helped rejuvenate life's flame;
Burnt beast, the son of Evil,
Its upheaval
Leaves him tame.

For love can turn the darkest night into treasured gold,
The impossible reality, the present misery old,
The cruel, cold Hatred dead,
Its severed head
A tale to be told.